# ITT I describe all the countries I've been to in one sentence.



## Tarvos (Aug 31, 2011)

Ok, so I haven't been to a particularly large amount of countries (18 to be exact). They are all European and North American. Hopefully I can make it 19 in January as I am planning a Lisbon trip. But here I'll describe, in one or two sentences, the props (and slops) of the countries I've been too. Feel free to regard it as a general travel thread though. By the way - I didn't really go to any resort type places (Egypt, Tunisian resorts) because it's not my thing. And also I'm not a corporate fag.

Scotland counts separately. But it is not included because I have not been there yet.

I go by UN countries otherwise. If you have been to South Sudan, do include it.

So (in no particular order)

Netherlands - My hometown. The land of weed, mills and things. Though I do like my little piece of heaven, and there are many many things about this place that appeal to me, it's just a little too quaint. Nice architecture, though. Also, it does get boring very fast. I mean, landscape is not our forte.

Denmark - Went there as a baby. I hear it's like Netherlands with a weirder language. Must return. I will know better then.

Luxembourg - As a baby too. I'm sure it's lovely. I'm sure I shat in it. 

Canada - Wonderful country. The food is bad and the people can be on the iffy side (but at least they're not overly religious), but plenty of hospitality to be found. The landscapes are gorgeous. Canada makes me feel very happy inside. Also, they speak English. And yes, I've been to Quebec, but Quebec French is crazy. I would heartily recommend Canada to the traveller. Lots of things to see and do - lots of space, too. If you like solitude, it is perfect. Winters are awful though. Be prepared for some real cold.

United States - There's been some very hospitable people, but customs are retarded, the government was/is a piece of shit, and the food is awful. Like in Canada, it gets better the further you go away from the big cities - Los Angeles, for my money, is a hellhole. I would not want to live in LA. The scenery is frequently gorgeous. I guess it's also a matter of being in the right state. As a rule, anything the US has, Canada does better, apart from the fact Canada has no hot deserts. It is ideal for road tripping and driving around, though.

Belgium - Netherlands' little cousin. Not my favourite place to be, but it sure works. And the government/language thing is absolutely stupid. They have good food, though. Belgium is just like the family member you like visiting often but sometimes you just get sick of it. 

France - Great scenery, good food, pity the French live there. That's France. I don't really get why France is so highly rated by people. It can be quaint in the countryside, but if gastronomy is all I'm going for then I can think of better places than France. Not the worst country in existence, but I don't think I want to go there often.

Germany - Efficient, precise, and fucking boring. Germany is like driving through a concrete wall. In Germany, things work, and people have a good life, though. Economically, I would love to work here. It's a pity that along with the good results they did not exactly create the fiesta atmosphere. German bread is fantastic, though.

Switzerland - Been there only for a day and it's a while back. I don't remember much except that Switzerland costs too much money, is neutral, and there are gorgeous mountains. Oh, and don't bother with Swiss German. It's really not German, whatever they tell you in the brochures.

Austria - Reminds me of Germany, only with more beer and prettier buildings. I hate to say that about Austria, because I know they don't want to be Germany II. It's not entirely the case. But like Germany, there's only so much of it you can take without wanting to escape up a mountain. Fortunately there are plenty.

Greece - Good food, wild people, pity it's way too fucking hot. I'm not such a partygoer. I will always hire a Greek cook for my food though. I fucking love Greek food. And the chicks are either gorgeous or bad.

Italy - Good food, lots of history - Rome is worth a visit. I like Italian warmth. Not the destination of my dreams, but they sure have a lot to talk about.

Vatican - It looks amazing. Pity it's owned by the Catholic Church.

Andorra - if you like neon lights and tax breaks, or enjoy skiing - I avoid all three

Spain - I did not fiesta enough here. Maybe I should go to Barcelona and do it. Pyrenees are worth a nice drive around. They are loco!

Czech Republic - Prague is gorgeous, well organised, they managed to speak English, and they have cheap food and good beer. If you want a good city trip, Prague should be on the top of your list. Don't forget the Jewish cemetery. You will laugh.

Iceland - Weirdest place I've ever been. There's not much people there, the atmosphere is provincial, quirky, but extremely hospitable, and the scenery is to die for. It's like a giant family decided to build a house on an Island, then had half their brothers move because it's wet, damp and cold. The ones that stayed built an ingenious way of life, but they still avoid going into the interior without uberprotection. Also, everyone you will meet and talk to will know the rest of town. Just because by town I mean five houses and they all eat hangikjot together. Or something. I really do love Iceland. One of the best trips.

England - Been there three times. London is too busy for me. Nice history, but the English give me the feeling they have still not yet figured out that despite them being from an island that doesn't mean you can do things the wrong way around. The language use is funny. The food is crap. I think I like Camden, though. Probably because it doesn't feel like England but more like a good goth party.

My favourite countries

1. Iceland
2. Canada
3. Czech Republic
4. Netherlands
5. Italy


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## Ruby (Aug 31, 2011)

tl;dr Iceland is Sinnoh


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## Tarvos (Aug 31, 2011)

marry me


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## Harlequin (Aug 31, 2011)

if scotland counts as its own place then so should wales, come to wales and enjoy our ... stuff idek

I agree with you on Prague, though -- it's a great place. Cheap food and beer and an over-all nice atmosphere.


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## Music Dragon (Aug 31, 2011)

And the golems?


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## Ruby (Aug 31, 2011)

Also you should probably rephrase the Jewish cemetery thing?!  I think I know what you were alluding to there, but the way you phrased it sounds kind of awful.


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## Tarvos (Aug 31, 2011)

The stones are entirely hotchpotch. It is HILARIOUS. In a sad way.


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## Lord of the Fireflies (Sep 2, 2011)

Tarvos said:


> Canada - Wonderful country. The food is bad and the people can be on the iffy side (but at least they're not overly religious), but plenty of hospitality to be found. The landscapes are gorgeous. Canada makes me feel very happy inside. Also, they speak English. And yes, I've been to Quebec, but Quebec French is crazy. I would heartily recommend Canada to the traveller. Lots of things to see and do - lots of space, too. If you like solitude, it is perfect. Winters are awful though. Be prepared for some real cold.


Quebec French ftw tabarnak

Quebec French is for France French what American English is for British English.

And we get used to the cold

someday


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## Phantom (Sep 2, 2011)

I am really starting to get touchy about all the US hate there is in the world.

EDIT: Says the girl with the British TV obsession.

For real though, I mean people automatically judge us all without having experiencing the good things my country does have. 


It's like saying all British people have bad teeth and drink nothing but tea because that's what you heard.

Visit MN.


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## Tailsy (Sep 3, 2011)

Phantom said:


> It's like saying all *British* people have bad teeth and drink nothing but tea because that's what you heard.









_why do you hurt me like this_


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## Phantom (Sep 3, 2011)

Sorry surskitty. :(

But in all seriousness, I've met people online who are like "YOU'RE AMERICAN? I FUCKING HATE AMERICA!", then I say, I am proud of my country, and they all say "WHAT!?" YOUR COUNTRY IS EBIL EVERYONE IN YOUR COUNTRY IS EBIL. And I be all :[

Then they yell at me that Canada is better. It gets annoying. 


And that totally is the scientific phrasing for that...

EDIT: DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT THINK ALL BRITISH PEOPLE HAVE BAD TEETH NOR DO THEY DRINK ONLY TEA. 

In fact I am not an ignorant idiot who judges and entire country without even living there.


I've been to two countries, Canada and Mexico. Canada we were bored and drove up there, it was the same as here believe it or not.... and Mexico as for an exchange program.


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## Lord of the Fireflies (Sep 3, 2011)

Everybody visit Quebec it's all nice and french-speaking and badly english-speaking but at least we try...

Also you gotta eat a poutine in your life

awkwardly pronounced poo-teen in English


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## RosesBones (Sep 3, 2011)

America is definitely not the greatest country ever, but I agree that all the hate on us is kind of annoying. Also, there are places here with excellent food. Food like fried chicken. *salivates*

I have never been out of America, but there are a ton of places that I want to visit someday. One day... *wistful gaze into the distance*

That said, I love California and I could never be too far away from San Francisco for too long. ^_^


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## Superbird (Sep 3, 2011)

US. Not as bad as you'd think.

My friends and I were having a discussion about economic systems the other day. We decided that Communism, in theory, is the best economic system in existence. But in application it's one of the worst. Meanwhile, Capitalism is almost the opposite: On paper it sounds horrible, but in the world it works out a lot better.

Honestly, I'd like to visit France someday. Then Britian. Or maybe Britian then France.


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## Vladimir Putin's LJ (Sep 3, 2011)

Superbird said:


> Capitalism is almost the opposite: On paper it sounds horrible, but in the world it works out a lot better.


hahaha

I pretty much agree with your post Tarvos. I'd love to visit Canada someday, and New Zealand :o Iceland sounds very appealing too tbh and everyone I know who's been there says it's cooler than two dogs rollerskating
I'd personally like to do the trans-Siberian but I need to convince a couple of people to go with me or my Russian friend told me I'd get killed, raped and mugged, in that order. :(


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## ultraviolet (Sep 3, 2011)

Phantom said:
			
		

> But in all seriousness, I've met people online who are like "YOU'RE  AMERICAN? I FUCKING HATE AMERICA!", then I say, I am proud of my  country, and they all say "WHAT!?" YOUR COUNTRY IS EBIL EVERYONE IN YOUR  COUNTRY IS EBIL. And I be all :[


yeah, because Australia is fucking scary and we all ride kangaroos and talk really dumb and there are POISONOUS THINGS EVERYWHERE and vegemite and g'day! and THIS is a knife! at least there's more than _one _kind of american in popular media.

honestly? I'm pretty sure most people have to deal with this on the internet unless they live somewhere obscure? not to mention that Tavros also had some good things to say about the US?


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## Aletheia (Sep 3, 2011)

Phantom said:


> Visit MN.


I DID
IT WAS AWESOME
THEN AGAIN I WAS CITY-WITH-MORE-THAN-A-MILLION-PEOPLE STARVED


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## Tarvos (Sep 3, 2011)

I like the US when there's not so many people around. That is the gist of it. Most people are either batshit insane or there is just too many people. Also Las Vegas is basically a giant piece of neon lights. I do like parts of the US: the Northwest is great, and I liked San Francisco. The rural areas are good for the scenery.

But the whole attitude that Americans have isn't my thing - I like a bit more "leave me alone, no, I don't want your shit or your overpriced food or your...and I can pack up my supermarket groceries myself, thanks".

Mostly it's the food that kills it, though. I wish they had good food... I ate better for two months in Brussels than I have in the combined 3 months total I've spent in the US.


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## Phantom (Sep 3, 2011)

Star69 said:


> I DID
> IT WAS AWESOME
> THEN AGAIN I WAS CITY-WITH-MORE-THAN-A-MILLION-PEOPLE STARVED


 
Ah ha! Where were you in MN? If you ever go again hit up Duluth or Two Harbors up North.

Personally I live in Minneapolis, and it's one of the coolest places ever.

EDIT: And we do not say "you betcha" I have never said that in conversation and do not plan to.


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## Aletheia (Sep 3, 2011)

Phantom said:


> Ah ha! Where were you in MN? If you ever go again hit up Duluth or Two Harbors up North.
> 
> Personally I live in Minneapolis, and it's one of the coolest places ever.
> 
> EDIT: And we do not say "you betcha" I have never said that in conversation and do not plan to.


Minneapolis is indeed where I spent most of my time there. And no, I did not hear a single instance of "you betcha."


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## Phantom (Sep 3, 2011)

Cool, if you visited Nicollet Island, the island on the Mississippi near downtown Minneapolis, you were right by my high school. (I went to school on that island)


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## Karkat Vantas (Sep 4, 2011)

You know, uv, you're pretty lucky to live in Australia. People see your location, they think "kangaroo jockey spouting funny colloquialisms". People see my location, they think "asshole who likes hot dogs".


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## Tailsy (Sep 4, 2011)

People don't think I have electricity or a house.


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## Lord of the Fireflies (Sep 4, 2011)

^Now this is hilarious. You're all like hey guys I live in Australia and they're all like uh how did you get yourself a computer? Time travel or something?


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## Autumn (Sep 4, 2011)

Lord of the Fireflies said:


> ^Now this is hilarious. You're all like hey guys I live in Australia and they're all like uh how did you get yourself a computer? Time travel or something?


http://notalwaysright.com/yukon-freeze-it/6613

there was another one at one point that was like "Oh my gosh, you have computers where you are?!" but I can't find it


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## Harlequin (Sep 5, 2011)

surskitty said:


> People don't think I have electricity or a house.


People don't think I have electricity or a house _and_ that I have sex with sheep.


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## Tailsy (Sep 5, 2011)

Harlequin said:


> People don't think I have electricity or a house _and_ that I have sex with sheep.


Goats _and_ sheep! Also that we stabby stab stab everyone.


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## octobr (Sep 5, 2011)

Wait this thread confuses me and I'm sure this is irrelevant and all but you said you were going to describe all the countries you've been to in one sentence and you didn't do that at all what happened between writing the topic name and writing the actual post because

I will do so though
all the countries I have visited, described in a sentence
"it is the usa"


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## Lord of the Fireflies (Sep 6, 2011)

Polymetric Sesquialtera said:


> http://notalwaysright.com/yukon-freeze-it/6613
> 
> there was another one at one point that was like "Oh my gosh, you have computers where you are?!" but I can't find it


I laughed so hard, thanks for the link! Numerous stories like these happened to a friend of mine, who spent about five years in Namibia when she was a kid, and people tought she didn't have access to computer, telephone and even _water._


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## Vladimir Putin's LJ (Sep 6, 2011)

When my mother first came to Belgium, she had people ask her if they had roads in Portugal.

She just told them we send all our correspondence by carrier pigeon.


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## ultraviolet (Sep 6, 2011)

Karkat Vantas said:


> You know, uv, you're pretty lucky to live in Australia. People see your location, they think "kangaroo jockey spouting funny colloquialisms". People see my location, they think "asshole who likes hot dogs".


people also think we're morons who don't get basic technology like mobile phones!

I mean, it's nice being able to say I've been attacked by a crocodile and have people _believe me_, but it's still mildly insulting that people are amazed I have the internet at all.

Also I'm pretty sure Australia's been contesting the title 'most obese country' with America for some time now, so the hotdog thing will apply here soon!


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## Ether's Bane (Sep 6, 2011)

ultraviolet said:


> people also think we're morons who don't get basic technology like mobile phones!
> 
> ...people are amazed I have the internet at all.


OH MY GOD, me too! XD

EDIT: By which I mean that people think that about me.


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## Butterfree (Sep 6, 2011)

Do Americans seriously, honest-to-God get people on the Internet telling them "YOU'RE FROM AMERICA YOU SUCK"? o_O _Most_ people on the Internet are Americans, in my experience.

Anyway, everyone should come to Iceland. Fact. (And talk to me first so we can meet.)


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## Ruby (Sep 6, 2011)

Vladimir Putin's LJ said:


> When my mother first came to Belgium, she had people ask her if they had roads in Portugal.
> 
> She just told them we send all our correspondence by carrier pigeon.


Don't worry, your jokes are better than your mother's.


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## goldenquagsire (Sep 6, 2011)

I don't get this anti-US hate. I've been twice to your country and it's one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen! The people are nice as well, in many cases nicer than in the UK - in my experience, people are a lot kinder towards tourists in the US than in Britain.

I think many people who make those kind of judgements have:
a) never actually visited the country
b) based all their information off the few mad buggers than end up on international news - yes, it's fun to laugh at the Westboro Baptist Church but they're no more representative of the Americans as the EDL are of the British



Butterfree said:


> Anyway, everyone should come to Iceland. Fact. (And talk to me first so we can meet.)


I was in your country for about three hours last month, when we stopped over on the way from Seattle. The airport is freaky, it's in the middle of nowhere right next to the sea. Also, it was bloody cold even in the middle of summer.



> why do you hurt me like this


Look on the positive side, at least no-one's called you English!


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## Saith (Sep 6, 2011)

Eh, in my experience, America's cool. In theory at least. I mean, like, it's a beautiful place, it's literally the land of opportunity, etc etc.
It's the Americans that suck.
I should clarify - All the Americans I've met have been cool, nice, chill, etc. But America has the same problem that practically every country has. When it stops becoming 'An American Person' and becomes 'The American People', shit goes down.
It's the same as Britain and practically every other country too - a person is usually good. People are shitty.
It's just that, what with America having so many people that just so happen to be very vocal and very outspoken, the shittiness is easier to see.

Here in Britain, you'll have a person saying something like 'Oh, well I know one of those rioters and he was a really nice guy, his mum died saving his life and he was a volunteer blah blah blah' but put that person with a bunch of other people, and you have torches and pitchforks practically begging for martial law. It's the same with that Snowdon thing from yesterday - if you tell almost anyone that a guy drove to the top of Mount Snowdon on a drunken bet and survived, I guarantee they'd buy the bloke a pint. Put 'em in a room with a bunch of other blokes, and they'll all be baying for his blood.


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## Tarvos (Sep 6, 2011)

Keflavik Airport is, as stated previously, literally in the middle of nowhere. They dropped it on an old lava field, built a road to Reykjavik, and left. You couldn't get a more isolated airport if you tried.

Iceland is great.

As for the UK, I don't remember too much of my visits except the most recent one, but as far as I know - I prefer the English to the Americans, just because I prefer English restraint.


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## shadow_lugia (Sep 6, 2011)

I've personally only been to America. My family is interesting though.

My stepfather used to live in Germany, where apparently you have to pay money to use the public restrooms, the beer is plentiful, and he ditched a taxi cab once.

My mom's side of the family used to live in South Korea because my grandmother teaches English, and the people there have a whole language with their car horns and love seafood, according to my mom.

My grandparents now live in Saudi Arabia, and apparently the plentiful camels give really thick milk, also my grandma scares any Muslim that tries to push their religion or their beliefs on her, and hates the weather, which is surprisingly hot and dry.


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## Crazy Linoone (Sep 7, 2011)

Butterfree said:


> Anyway, everyone should come to Iceland. Fact. (And talk to me first so we can meet.)


Tell us some cool Iceland tourist spots so I can convince my parents to vacation there some day! Information from a native is always better than the ones from some random traveling site.


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## goldenquagsire (Sep 7, 2011)

> As for the UK, I don't remember too much of my visits except the most recent one, but as far as I know - I prefer the English to the Americans, just because I prefer English restraint.


Oh god, the Stiff Upper Lip is so overrated. In the US, if a company is offering you crap service you and everyone around you will kick up a massive fuss and ensure that it get fixed. In the UK, everyone just grumbles quietly and accepts whatever bull is thrown at them.

Of course, sometimes people can take it too far (this site lists some particularly ridiculous examples), but you need to stand up for yourselves every so often.


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## Tarvos (Sep 7, 2011)

I rather have grumbling than the US service of "BUY MY SHIT PLEASE HOW CAN I HELP YOU". 

That service is so fake it hurts. At least the English don't care and act like it.


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## Dannichu (Sep 15, 2011)

I visited the US this year and absolutely loved it. The people we met were all lovely - the strangers we bumped into all seemed thrilled to meet people from the UK and while I love that kind of enthusiasm, I understand how people could prefer the more restrained approach people in the UK generally have.

I like pretty much every country I've been to (about half of Europe, the US and NZ), but I'm extremely easily pleased, so.


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## Tarvos (Sep 29, 2011)

Crazy Linoone said:


> Tell us some cool Iceland tourist spots so I can convince my parents to vacation there some day! Information from a native is always better than the ones from some random traveling site.


Funnily enough, the natives always seem to know less because they don't visit their own tourist spots.

Anyway, depending on what you want, in Iceland I can recommend the following:

- Go to the Blue Lagoon. If you've ever wondered what it's like to take a warm swim inside a lava field, this would be it. Do wash your hair though - you will get caked in sea salt.

- Hike through the interior. Iceland's interior is _massive_. If you're scared about the dangers, you can go on a guided tour - I did not, and I am quite happy about that (saves money and you get to stay where you want for as long as you like). Keep in mind that if you do this - Iceland's weather is like an ugly girl in a wardrobe - they just can't choose what to put on, and half the time, it ends up looking positively awful. There's plenty scenery to be had.

I will be back in Iceland one day, when I get monies. Iceland is so damn expensive.


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