# Eifie vs. Music Dragon II: A Battle of Wits



## The Omskivar (Apr 4, 2015)

Spoiler: Arena



This is a challenge of wits for Music Dragon!

*Format:* 1v1 quadruple
*Style:* extremely, extremely cool.
*DQ:* 7 days
*Damage Cap:* 30%
*Banned/Restricted Moves:* OHKOs, direct healing, Pain Split. Attacks and abilities that rely on gender can be used, but will fail. Chill can be used, but does not restore energy.
*Arena Description:* The Tree of Dreams

At the center of a clearing on the Island of Dreams lies the Tree of Dreams, an ancient tree rumoured to grant wishes to those who leave offerings of berries at its roots. The area around the tree is pretty unremarkable; it's covered entirely in grass, but this being the Dream World, Pokémon are able to summon the resources to use any attack of theirs that they please (save for banned moves), and Pokémon that normally need water to move around will have no trouble maneuvering on this terrain.

Before the battle begins, the tree is willing to grant each Pokémon a wish to grow stronger like its friends. Pokémon will, for the duration of the battle, be transformed into any stage of their evolution line that their trainer chooses, and have access to all of that stage's moves and its dream ability in place of their own. Each Pokémon will be disguised as another Pokémon in its trainer's active squad, akin to the effects of a permanent Illusion. There is no way for the opposing Pokémon to see through or remove this illusion; their trainer can only try to guess what species the Pokémon really is from the events of the battle.

*Additional Rules:*

Status Conditions: Sleep and confusion can be inflicted at most once on each Pokémon (self-inflicted statuses do not count for this). A sleeping Pokémon will sleep for at most two actions before waking up. A confused Pokémon will hit itself in its confusion once on its next action after becoming confused, then be cured of the condition. Paralysis can cause at most one failure to move, but speed is decreased and the condition fades as normal.

Intriguing Illusions: Sendouts, along with the Pokémon to be disguised as and choice of held item that the trainer owns (if applicable), will be PMed to the ref before command order is posted. Each Pokémon is in disguise, and will be described as carrying out all of its actions as if it was the Pokémon it's disguised as (even if they don't make sense! This is the Dream World, after all. The Feebas in it are perfectly capable of using Wing Attack and Jump Kick.) and all of the information displayed in its summary (sprite, ability, etc.) will be that of that Pokémon. Actual type matchups, inherently/consensually hovering/flying status, etc. will still be that of the actual Pokémon.

The ref is requested not to provide any details about individual damage and energy calculations, only the final tallies. If, say, a Pokémon's actual ability is activated (for example, Guts), the ref is requested not to mention this in the Pokémon's status; the other trainer will have to try to notice it on their own from the events of battle or final tallies! Basically, the ref is asked not to reveal anything or give hints about any Pokémon's actual identity (like, idk, putting something like "The Sneasel giggled in a very non-Sneasel-like way reminiscent of a dog Pokémon" or something in the flavour).



[size=+2]*Eifie vs Music Dragon II*[/size]

*Eifie's active squad*

 *Nando* the female Combusken <Blaze> @ Lucky Egg
 *Adelle* the female Espeon <Synchronize>
 *Mimsy* the female Sentret <Keen Eye> @ Sachet
 *Wheelbarrow Dumping* the male Swinub <Oblivious>
 *Pepper* the female Wingull <Keen Eye>
 *blob of wax* the male Litwick <Flash Fire> @ Dusk Stone
 *Lena* the female Bayleef <Overgrow> @ Lucky Egg
 *blob of web* the female Goomy <Gooey>
 *blob of actual blobbiness* the female Misdreavus <Levitate> @ Dusk Stone
 *Barfie* the male Zigzagoon <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry


*Music Dragon's active squad*

 *Pravus* the male Steelix <Rock Head>
 *Doctor Proctor* the male Exeggutor <Chlorophyll>
 *The Beast* the male Aerodactyl <Pressure>
 *Goach* the male Whiscash <Oblivious>
 *Enoch* the genderless Solrock <Levitate>
 *Parfenova* the female Spritzee <Aroma Veil>
 *King of Hearts* the male Sigilyph <Magic Guard>
 *Lillibeth* the female Spoink <Own Tempo>
 *Witch Doctor Nana* the female Carnivine <Levitate> @ Binding Band
 *Ant Heater* the male Heatmor <Flash Fire>

PM_ME_UR_POKEYMANS


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## The Omskivar (Apr 6, 2015)

After consulting with each Trainer and the League-owned Musharna that would be assisting them in reaching the Dream World, The Omskivar gave Music Dragon a glass of warm milk, and Eifie, a blob of warm milk.  The referee nodded to the Musharna, which gave a sort of whistly, soothing hum as the smoke from its blowhole blossomed and swelled forward...

And suddenly, they were in a misty clearing.  The Trainers looked around, the air vaguely familiar and yet entirely otherworldly, all at once.  Each of them was _sure_ that they had seen this enormous, beautiful tree before, but at the same time they'd--

"--never seen _anything_ like it before, have you?"

The Omskivar had appeared behind them--they hadn't seen how.  After appreciating the greenery and the scenery for a little while longer, Eifie and Music Dragon threw their Pokeballs.  The mist warped around them as they flew, mixing with the white energy that emerged before it solidified.  One might have sworn they saw some tendrils of Dream Mist emanating directly from the tree itself, but before they could be sure, a sharp bark announced the materialization of an adorable Zigzagoon.

Wide-eyed, Barfie shook his body to loosen it, his spine-like fur making a sound like a rainstick.  Across from him, King of Hearts, Music Dragon's big, awkward-looking Siglyph, looked around (or seemed to; it's very hard to tell with Sigilyph, even to the most experienced referees) as if it had lost something.  The airborne Pokemon chittered, then started floating in a small, very precise circle over the ground.

*Pre-Battle*
Team Eifie

Barfie (M) [Gluttony] @ Lansat Berry
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Condition: Panting with pent-up energy.

Team Music Dragon

King of Hearts (M) [Magic Guard]
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Condition: Nervous?​
Okay y'all let's get the show on the road!  Now just to make sure, do you want me to switch the descriptions to the disguise's Hidden Ability?  Since everyone's getting Hidden Abilities anyway.

Eifie commands first!


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## Eifie (Apr 6, 2015)

It hardly matters either way, but I guess you could switch the abilities!

Yes Barfie, you _are_ adorable! So adorably adorable. Awww, let me give you a hug.

Now, it's basically impossible to predict anything our opponent could do this round, so let's just have a bit of fun for now. Start with a *Mud-Slap*. Use it even if he has clones or a Substitute. If he makes himself unhittable otherwise, just test out your *Hidden Power* on him if you can still reach him, otherwise just take it out on that big ol' tree.

Next idk man, just make yourself three *Double Team* clones or something. At least make him waste his time getting rid of them. If you're Taunted, use the one of *Mud-Slap* and *Hidden Power* that you haven't used already, with the same caveats about the tree.

Finally, uh, try a *Toxic*? That should be fun. If you're Taunted or he has a sub or he's Protecting or unreachable however, just use *Hidden Power* if you've used Mud-Slap before, otherwise stick with *Mud-Slap*. Man, commanding first in the very first round of this is hard. Next round we shall be back with a vengeance! >:(

*Mud-Slap / Hidden Power ~ Double Team (3 clones) / Mud-Slap / Hidden Power ~ Toxic / Mud-Slap / Hidden Power*


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## Music Dragon (Apr 6, 2015)

Beaten once by a Doctor... and soon to be beaten by a King. Wahaha! Let the jousting begin!

Now then, my colourful King! Let us not tip our hand this early. Lead with *Protect*, to avoid that Mud-Slap. After all, a Mud-Slap says more than a thousand words, or so it is said! 

We shall want to deal with those Double Team clones over yonder, but alas, you do not learn any moves that would effectively dispel them all! May I suggest a *Round* of your royal singing? They ought to be honored!

And for your last action, a blob of Toxic is incoming, my lord. Well, so be it: do your best to avoid it, but should you get poisoned, at least a *Facade* will take advantage of that, and it works either way. However, if your opponent was immune to Round in the previous action, I suspect we may be dealing with a ghost; in that case, use *Hidden Power* instead.

Royal *Protect ~* Royal *Round ~* Royal *Facade / Hidden Power*


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## The Omskivar (Apr 24, 2015)

*Pre-Battle*
Team Eifie

Barfie (M) [Gluttony] @ Lansat Berry
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Condition: Panting with pent-up energy.

Team Music Dragon

King of Hearts (M) [Magic Guard]
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Condition: Nervous?

*Round the First*​

The King of Hearts stared at his opponent with his two frontal eyes, his elevated third eye unmoving.  In the dream mist, his actions seemed more relaxed, more patient--but before Barfie could act, His Majesty gave a sudden upward jerk of his wings, and a green barrier cut through the cloudy air.

Barfie stood on his hind legs, having prepared to throw some detritus into the King's three eyes, but rested on his front paws again as he saw the Protect.  He cocked his head at Eifie, who coaxed him forward.  Barfie gave a sharp bark and grinned, his eyes clouding, then glowing with a mysterious white light.  His body shuddered, then crackled as yellow sparks began to jump from prickle to prickle; he lurched forwards, and a precise jolt of electricity leapt from Barfie to the King, only to be cut short by the King's royal shield.  The electricity pressed into the green wall of light, emitting sparks and an intense humming noise, before rebounding forcefully to connect with the great Tree of Dreams.  With a loud _crack!_, a small bough jostled as a black scorch mark appeared at its base.  Somewhere in Nebraska, a small boy fidgeted in his sleep as his dream took a sudden detour; now, instead of being inaugurated as the President of the United States, he was being inaugurated as the President of the United States _in his underwear_.

Back in etheria, the King's barrier dissipated.  Barfie winked at him, then vanished.

Okay, Barfie didn't _really_ vanish.  But he did run around so fast that the King couldn't very well keep track of him.  Oh, there he was--no, there--there?  When he finally came back into view, Barfie was surrounded by three identical Zigzagoons, surveying his illusory masterpiece.  This was great!  Now he had some backup.  It'd be hard to tell them apart, though--and no sooner had he thought it than the dream mist swirled around them, and four different hats appeared atop their heads--a policeman's hat, a fireman's hat, a baseball cap, and a wizard's hat.

The King of Hearts sighed inwardly, mildly frustrated.  Great.  Now there were _four_ of them.  They all sat there, with that stupid, tongue-panting look on their face, just staring at him, expectantly.  Waiting.  Like--The Sigilyph's eyes widened slightly in realization.  Like an _audience_.

It was time for a _show_.

Closing his stomach-eyes (Sigilyph biology is weird), the King felt the music within him.  Though he had no visible mouth or mouth analogue, His Majesty's voice rang true, softly at first, but with quickly rising confidence and volume:

_"Y'AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT A HOUND DOG"_

All of the Barfies' ears perked up.  Was a hound dog...bad?

_"CRYYYIN' ALL THE TIME"_

They looked at one another, confused.  They were pretty sure they hadn't cried at all.

_"Y'AIN'T NEVA CAUGHTA RABBIT"_

Now this was just silly.

_"AND YOU *AIN'T NO FRIEND AH MINE*"_

But that--that was just _heartbreaking_.  The Barfies frowned at each other--except for the fireman.  He was too busy groaning in sudden pain--whether the attack was directed at him, or whether the curved shape of his hat had drawn in the royal cacophony, it wasn't clear, but in an instant he faded into nonexistence.

The King of Hearts did his best to simulate the Elvis pelvis, but couldn't figure out what part of his body constituted a pelvis.  When he realized that he wasn't getting the thunderous applause he deserved, he turned his attention back to the Barfies to find that only three remained.  Worse yet, they appeared to be _vomiting_.  The audacity!  The heresy!  Without warning, a sludgy mass of purple gunk soared an impressive distance; His Royal Highness attempted to twist out of the way, but his efforts were in vain, as the poisonous phlegm splattered onto his radiant skin.  Barfie licked his lips, smirking, as the King of Hearts shuddered and chirruped indignantly.

With the Sigilyph equivalent of a mighty roar (you're just going to have to use your imagination okay), he swooped at the wizard-hat Barfie--wizards are always trying to usurp the throne--and stabbed at it with his little fork-legs, ripping the hat off and flying away with it.  Except...he wasn't holding anything. His Grace looked at his empty appendage, then spun around to see the second of Barfie's clones disappear into the mist.  Enraged at being fooled twice, the King began another assault, but was stopped by the referee's whistle and flag.  Muttering to himself, he imagined an elaborate golden crown, which appeared atop his spherical body.  He then imagined a hole in it so he could see with his scalp eye.  He then shuddered, as the toxins sank into his body.

*Round the First*
Team Eifie

Barfie (M) [Gluttony] @ Lansat Berry
Health: 100%
Energy: 90%
Condition: Living up to his name.
Status: Hidden Power: Electric.  Has one clone remaining.

Team Music Dragon

King of Hearts (M) [Magic Guard]
Health: 99%
Energy: 84%
Condition: _Off with his head(s?)!!_
Status: Badly poisoned (1% this round, 2% the next)​
Notes
-Barfie's Hidden Power is Electric-type.
-Don't fuck with the tree.
-Round hit a clone.
-I didn't say anything either way, but the King of Hearts has a pretty good voice for something with no visible...anything
-Toxic almost missed.  I did factor in that the King was ordered to try and avoid it, but the chance wasn't very high.
-Facade hit a clone.
-Sigilyph is so fucking weird MD why did you do this to me

**paging Dr. Maggon, Dr. Doosic Maggon to the commands please**


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## Music Dragon (Apr 24, 2015)

Now that's what I'm talking about! A fantastic musical performance, Your Majesty! You truly are King of Kings. Excellent.

Hmm. Let's keep playing it safe; next round we'll be about ready to start using proper elemental attacks, but not yet. We ought to get rid of the remaining clone, and your *Hidden Power* seems like an excellent way to do so - as an added bonus, we'll find out what type it is! There will be much rejoicing.

Continue to use Hidden Power until you've successfully established what type it is. After that, go back to using *Facade*. It'll hit pretty hard, I imagine.

Oh, and if your opponent tries to hit you with that electrical Hidden Power at any point, you need to *Protect*. A King must be allowed to have some secrets, after all!

*Hidden Power / Protect ~ Hidden Power / Facade / Protect ~ Hidden Power / Facade / Protect *


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## Eifie (Apr 24, 2015)

Hm, I would like to minimize the damage from those Facades, so let him use Hidden Power and then go ahead and make a medium *Substitute*, Barfie. Then, you know what? We can tip our hand a little. It's not a secret how very *Charm*ing you are, anyway. Finally, let's confirm this suspicion of mine with a *Shadow Ball*.

*Substitute (15%) ~ Charm ~ Shadow Ball*


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## The Omskivar (May 2, 2015)

*Pre-Battle*
Team Eifie

Barfie (M) [Gluttony] @ Lansat Berry
Health: 100%
Energy: 90%
Condition: Living up to his name.
Status: Hidden Power: Electric.  Has one clone remaining.

Team Music Dragon

King of Hearts (M) [Magic Guard]
Health: 99%
Energy: 84%
Condition: _Off with his head(s?)!!_
Status: Badly poisoned (1% this round, 2% the next)

*Round the Second*​

The King of Hearts's stalked eye began to glow a bright white through the noncorporeal crown, just like Barfie's eyes had at the battle's start--except there was no electricity to be found here.  From the radiant antenna were spat an array of white-blue spheres, which gave off the windlike sound of a fire being fanned, but without the crackling of the fuel.  The spheres of energy danced around His Majesty in a ring, then shot suddenly towards policeman-Barfie, cutting through the dream mist to send him flying bodily through baseball-Barfie, who vanished with a surprised yelp.

Barfie rolled with the attack, just in case his fur caught fire.  Getting up, he licked the area in which he'd been struck, bounding back to the fight once he was satisfied.  He shook himself off, then imagined himself a bodyguard (why waste time building one out of dream dirt when you can just dream one up?).  Barfie blinked, then opened his eyes to be met with an identical pair of eyes.  Substitute-Barfie barked and licked his creator on his face, who grinned and licked him right back.  The real Barfie (please) stood up, raising his hands above his head and bringing them down to place a newly-imagined football helmet on his substitute's head.  It was time to get out there and take some hits!  Officer Barfie spanked his star defender as he charged to take the lead.

The Barfie Brothers wasted no time, planting themselves alongside one another and...made cute faces at the King.  THey wagged their prickly tails in unison, cocked their heads and panted, tongues hanging to the side.  The King watched them stoically, unwavering--until football-Barfie's helmet slipped down over his eyes and hung crooked.  By His Majesty's own stars, that was just _adorable_.  But his moment of weakness was short-lived; while his opponent had admittedly, somehow, stirred something in his royal heart, the King could feel the poison leeching through his complicated, nonsensical body, having an acute sense for exactly what was happening to him.  Though he was still alive, still fighting, he feared for his life, and his fear turned to anger as he dove towards his adorable helmet-wearing opponent.  Football-Barfie braced himself for impact, straightening his helmet and lowering his head.  The offending Sigilyph battered the substitute with every appendage he had in a fury, pushing the Zigzagoon-analogue backwards a good four feet before finally letting up and flying past him.

There came a whimper from inside the helmet, and Officer Barfie looked over to see a shaken, but reassuring, grin from his protector.  Unfortunately, a second later it dissipated into dream mist without warning, scattered in a billowing fog by the King plowing mercilessly through it.  Barfie's jaw dropped.  Then he, too, became angry, narrowing his eyes and growling as a purpley-black ball began to swell in the space in front of his mouth.  When it grew to surpass his own head in size, Barfie shouted in defiance, sending it soaring towards the King, striking him on his crown and blasting through it to hit the base of his third eye.  The King shouted indignantly, then writhed as the poison within him took its toll.

*Round the First*
Team Eifie

Officer Barfie (M) [Gluttony] @ Lansat Berry
Health: 79%
Energy: 76%
Condition: Mourning the loss of every friend he makes.
Status: Hidden Power: *Electric*.

Team Music Dragon

King of Hearts (M) [Magic Guard]
Health: 85%
Energy: 65%
Condition: Carefully constructing a fancier crown.
Status: Atk -2.  Badly poisoned (2% this round, 3% the next).  Hidden Power: *Dragon*.​
Notes
-Hidden Power hit the real Barfie.
-The King's Hidden Power is Dragon-typed.
-Shadow Ball was close to critting _and_ close to dropping Sp.Def, but did not do either of those things.
-I love hats guys
-I wrote the two Facades happening in a row but that was just for flavor, Barfie's attack went off first.

*Eifie to command*


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## Eifie (May 2, 2015)

Good work, Barfie! Continue hurling those *Shadow Ball*s. Do so even if he Protects. If you end up poisoned, paralyzed, or burned, switch to *Facade*, unless you're Telekinesis'd; then stick with *Shadow Ball*. If you can't reach him at all (e.g. Fly or similar), or he has clones, try *Focus Energy* the first action, medium *Substitute* the second action, and *Reflect* the third.

*Shadow Ball / Facade / Focus Energy ~ Shadow Ball / Facade / Substitute (10%) ~ Shadow Ball / Facade / Reflect*

simple is better, less stress and wind resistance, etc. etc.


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## Music Dragon (May 2, 2015)

Welp! Gig's up, Your Majesty. On the bright side, that means we can bring out the big guns next round. But first, you need to stop thinking about those charming barf-smiles... and I think I know just how. Let's go with one of my favourite tactics: swag n' snag! Use your royal *Swag* to show that impudent catdog who's the King of this castle. Then, while he's all riled up, you're free to create some *Double Team* clones. I don't expect you'll be able to make very many, but that's not the point; just do your best. Finally, use *Psych Up* to steal all that empowering fury!

*Swagger ~ Double Team ~ Psych Up*


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## Keldeo (Jun 21, 2015)

Eifie (O)

*Conjuror Barfie* (m) <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry
Health: 79%
Energy: 76%
Currently: Mourning the loss of every friend he makes. Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing an _extremely dapper_ miniature top hat.
Commands: Shadow Ball / Facade / Focus Energy ~ Shadow Ball / Facade / Substitute (10%) ~ Shadow Ball / Facade / Reflect

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 85%
Energy: 65%
Currently: Carefully constructing a fancier (and _more dapperer_) crown. -2 Attack. Poisoned (toxic: 2% this round, 3% next.) Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power.
Commands: Swagger ~ Double Team ~ Psych Up

*Round 3*​
In the time between rounds, the two battlers bound and flap towards their respective trainers, eager for the round’s commands. As Eifie whispers commands into Barfie’s ear, the Zigzagoon’s smile gradually grows until he looks like the catdog with the canary, shaking and shivering to emit a frighteningly loud cracking sound as the police cap on his head morphs into a magician’s top hat. Across the field, Music Dragon’s orders given, King of Hearts’ eyes narrow almost imperceptibly, and he begins to exert control over the Dream Mist that he hasn’t used to improve his crown. There is _no way_ His Very Majestic Majesty can be surpassed in the art of smiling—never mind that he doesn’t have a mouth to smile with! With a thought, a glimmering grin carves itself into the incorporeal diamonds balanced delicately under King’s third eye, its ends twitching ever so often, almost like the cat with a canary _mountain_ or _planet_ or something. 

Meanwhile, The Omskivar is animatedly discussing something on his phone while walking aimlessly through the clearing. The referee is so engrossed in the conversation that he steps backwards into the Tree to punctuate a sentence before either trainer can shout a warning, disappearing as suddenly as the trainers had appeared earlier. Slightly unsure whether or not they should call for a new referee or wait for The Omskivar to reappear, King of Hearts glances at his opponent, who nods and transmits a telepathic message to the Musharna maintaining the world’s existence. 

Soon, another referee pops into existence in front of the tree, accompanied by a poof of Dream Mist that drenches her in warm milk. When waving her flags around doesn’t spur action from the surprised battlers, the referee makes an impatient gesture with her head and wipes annoyedly at the liquid dripping off her legs. Barfie glances back at his trainer for confirmation and turns back to the battle when Eifie nods and motions for him to go on. The Zigzagoon shivers again, but this time the startling crackles are accompanied by the appearance of an ink-like gray substance that pools ominously around Barfie’s front paws, eventually coalescing into a purplish ball in front of him. With another shake for effect, he fires the sphere at King of Hearts. The Sigilyph screeches in anguish as the shadowy material sears into his face, leaving a nasty scar that sizzles and burns with ghostly energy when he moves. 

Flapping hurriedly in an attempt to recover from the attack, the King of Hearts diverts his attention from the battle to examine his mental palace, whose walls are similarly defaced, before turning back to Barfie, features schooled into an expression that betrays none of the annoyance he feels. _wow_, he says, in the driest psychic voice he can manage. _many hurt. such scary._ The Zigzagoon is outraged: he’s a blob of catdog-raccoon, darn it, not a cat_doge_! _Or are you?!_, comes a mental voice Barfie needs a second to place as King’s work yet again, and that just does it. It’s the middle of a battle! He doesn’t need this bird-windchime-thing questioning his existence. 

With a ferocious roar-yelp of _VERY STOP!_, Barfie leaps at King of Hearts, claws outstretched and ready to teach that meddling Sigilyph a lesson in dogeish—wait, is that dogese? But his mental hesitation costs him; King of Hearts do(d)ges easily out of the way, and Barfie hits the ground with a muffled _oof,_ mushing his face in hard enough to make his vision swim when he looks back up… no, that’s just the King’s oddly agile movement for such an awkward-looking avian, soaring blurry rings around the Zigzagoon. Barfie rolls over and cringes in preparation, sure an attack is incoming what with the momentum King of Hearts is building up. When neither a whoosh of cutting wind passes overhead nor sharp talons rake into his fur, he blinks and glances over at his opponent—or, rather, opponents. Five identically smug Sigilyph, each with his own grinning crown, flap impassively overhead, and Barfie curses inwardly, his rage already fading. 

Stealing his tricks, huh? thinks the Zigzagoon, with more than a little annoyance. Low blow, but he’s got a canary up the hole in his sleeve, or whatever the metaphor is. Settling onto his hind legs into somewhat of a sitting position, Barfie waves his front paws in the air in front of him, hoping it looks at least vaguely mystical-ish, and wills Psychic energy to flow into his limbs and form a protective dome. When no such energy comes, he frowns again and flaps his paws up and down in the hopes of at least doing something, but nothing happens. Sighing, the Zigzagoon stabilizes his top hat with a temporary construct of Dream Mist and scrutinizes the Sigilyph above him in an attempt to distract himself from his failure, searching fruitlessly for some tell or twitch that tells the real King of Hearts from the others. Being poisoned and tired, perhaps he’d move slower? Or…

Above him, the Kings roll their combined fifteen eyes in unison; looks like it’s time to teach this poser how _real_ psychics do things. Every clone’s third eye glows a faint pink and narrows in concentration as the real King of Hearts invades his target’s head, skimming through to map the various layers of feelings and thoughts. Within seconds, he’s produced a perfect facsimile of Barfie’s mental state, which he uses to repair the deficiencies in his own. King feels a swell of satisfaction as his opponent’s good-as-new mental palace fills in the gaps in his own, allowing himself a rattling laugh that's five times as loud as normal thanks to his clones' help. Barfie barks and bristles in irritation, but doesn’t let the taunt distract him from continuing to stare fixedly at King’s clones… 

Eifie (O)

*Barfie* (m) <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry
Health: 73%
Energy: 69%
Currently: _I bet it’s the middle one. No, the fourth looks a little off-sync with the others… but maybe I’m just imagining it?_ Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a miniature top hat… but who knows what it’ll transform into next?
Used: Shadow Ball ~ (confused) ~ nothing

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 70%
Energy: 54%
Currently: In possession of a spiral galaxy of canaries, despite his waning physical state. Has 4 clones and 4 dapper crowns to match. Poisoned (toxic: 3% this round, 4% next.) Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power.
Used: Swagger ~ Double Team ~ Psych Up

Action Notes
-Taking over from Omskivar, so tell me if I’ve missed something. If you think one of my calcs is off, I’ll double-check it.
-Shadow Ball lowered King of Hearts’ Special Defense, which was returned to normal, as well as his lowered Attack, when he used Psych Up.
-King of Hearts wasn’t commanded to make a certain number of clones, so he made 4.
-Also, Eifie, you wrote to make a medium substitute but Substitute (10%) in your command string; it didn’t end up mattering, but it’s just a note for the future, I guess?

MD commands next.


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## Keldeo (Jun 26, 2015)

Slightly early DQ warning for Music Dragon. You have a little more than 48 hours to post commands.


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## Eifie (Jun 26, 2015)

Ah! Is my rival afraid to stand up to me?! Turn around and face me like a dragon!

(pls don't DQ him though)


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## Music Dragon (Jun 26, 2015)

Ugh, sorry! I've been on vacation so I haven't had much time to work on master plans and such. But speaking of vacation, I think this calls for some... _Death in Paradise_! You know, like that awful TV show? With the police officer and he's in a suit while on the beach and it's supposed to be funny? Gosh, he must have such a small comfort zone! Just like me!

Anyway, sunny vacation time! Start with *Sunny Day* so I can do some sunbathing. Then, as long as it's still sunny, go all out with *Solar Beams*! Like I said, we're bringing out the big guns. However, if any reflectable moves are incoming, bounce them right back with *Magic Coat* instead. That should deter them! Hehehe! Finally, if none of the above are applicable or possible, default to *Psychic*.

Hoohoohoo! Best of luck to yoo!

*Sunny Day / Magic Coat / Psychic ~ Solar Beam / Magic Coat / Psychic ~ Solar Beam / Magic Coat / Psychic*


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## Eifie (Jun 26, 2015)

Aha! I think it's time to tip our hand a bit more...! Make me a *medium Substitute* (and I mean actually medium this time) to sponge up those Solar Beams, then destroy those clones with a *Natural Gift* and end off with a *Thunderbolt*. That along with the poison damage should get His Majesty close enough to the cap. Have fun!

*Substitute (15%) ~ Natural Gift ~ Thunderbolt*


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## Keldeo (Jun 27, 2015)

Eifie (O)

*Barfie* (m) <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry
Health: 73%
Energy: 69%
Currently: _I bet it’s the middle one. No, the fourth looks a little off-sync with the others… but maybe I’m just imagining it?_ Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a miniature top hat… but who knows what it’ll transform into next?
Commands: Substitute (15) ~ Natural Gift ~ Thunderbolt

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 70%
Energy: 54%
Currently: In possession of a spiral galaxy of canaries, despite his waning physical state. Has 4 clones and 4 dapper crowns to match. Poisoned (toxic: 3% this round, 4% next.) Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power.
Commands: Sunny Day / Magic Coat / Psychic ~ Solar Beam / Magic Coat / Psychic ~ Solar Beam / Magic Coat / Psychic

*Round 4*​
Upon hearing his commands, Barfie wilts a little and even deigns to lift his chocolatey gaze from the Kings of Hearts to give Eifie a truly heart-melting stare, supplementing his performance with a little choked sob-gasp. No mention of his hat? None at all…? But then his trainer finishes her sentence with the words "to the cap," and all becomes well. Resolved upon his path, the Zigzagoon bristles and shakes again, spirits restored. The five Kings of Hearts shy away a little and the real one primes himself to dodge, knowing that an attack probably won't hit but still wary of a particularly well-aimed Shadow Ball. 

No such attack comes, however; instead, Barfie has managed to dislodge a surprising amount of jagged brown and tan fur with a consistency like uncondensed felt. Grinning, he starts to shape the mound into a loose heap around as large as he is, gives the rough ball four legs and a tail with a few expert claw-strokes, and adds the characteristic spikes of Zigzagoon fur and small indents for its eyes and nose. Now, he thinks, mentally cackling like a supervillain whose plan has just come to fruition, his newest friend is nearly ready to go—but it still needs a few finishing touches. Placing one paw dramatically on his creation's snout, Barfie imparts a little of his own life energy into the doll, feeling notably more tired after he does so, and puts his magician's hat onto the already-barking quasi-Zigzagoon's head, summoning a herringbone-patterned tweed cap to replace it. Smirking a little, Barfie turns back towards his opponent's clones, construct more than ready to  in case King tries something.

The substitute perks up and raises its hackles slightly as the Kings of Hearts look to the sky, wings outstretched, and cry out sharply. Barfie straightens to attention, ears straining to figure out which King the sound came from, but the noise seems to echo strangely—King's muddling his senses with psychic interference, then—and he just can't quite discern its origin. All five Sigilyph begin to glow red, with no noticeable effect whatsoever other than their... glowing red. Huh. A little nonplussed that their trainer commanded them to carry out a maneuver they have no idea how to perform, the Kings of Hearts telekinetically rip some chunks out of their opponent's substitute before retreating into the shade of the great tree with a sigh. It wouldn't do to have the illusion revealed so early, though, so King makes sure his clones stay well away from any low branches or other protrusions. Otherwise, the Sigilyph is mostly content to watch the show his foe seems to be making of himself and try to restrain his laughter. A King must retain _some_ semblance of dignity, after all.

Damaged substitute hot on his heels, Barfie races around the clearing in frustration. So the King's doing glowing things, huh. He can do glowing things, or at least a… weird force sphere thing. (He never really figured Natural Gift out, okay?) With a grunt, the Zigzagoon presses his paws together, concentrating on giving his innate strength physical form, and when he brings them apart, a sleek torpedo of shining energy takes shape between them. As his substitute watches appreciatively, letting out a happy yelp ever so often, Barfie gives the bullet a nudge, watching the glowing trail of white it leaves behind as it makes its way slowly—too slowly—towards his opponent. King of Hearts can't hold back a chuckle now, not even bothering to avoid what looks like a sure miss—but then the shimmering path of energy seems to leap forwards faster than he would have thought possible, doubling upon its start and forming a beam aimed unerringly towards the real him. The Sigilyph lets out a sigh as Barfie's attack impacts him with a crackle of white and his clones flicker out as he drifts downward a little and lets his gaze wander, appearing almost dejected, and Barfie crows and struts about, proud of his work.

But no, King of Hearts is working double-time, sifting through and rejecting plans for retaliation, combining parts from the most promising into an elaborate Frankenstein's monster. This brutality against a King, this _deception_ of a King, cannot be condoned, and he isn't about to let some uppity Zigzagoon shatter the influence over the Kingdom that he built up so carefully. The time has come for him to unleash his ultimate technique and Master Plan… Opening his mental walls to let the ambient Psychic energy around him flow freely in and out, King of Hearts intones the Words to Summon the Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun, the weapon passed down to him from his father, King of Hearts before him: _Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun, I summon you,_ and a lance of glowing solar energy builds itself from the hilt up in front of him. Gripping his rather unfortunately-named weapon tightly in a telekinetic hand—wings are _so_ inconvenient for situations like this—King of Hearts flaps leisurely over to his opponent, who cowers behind his substitute, and demolishes the construct in a few strokes, the Psychic construct charring what it doesn't sear straight through. 

Soon, to the horror of its creator, Barfie's substitute is merely a few meager tufts of blackened fur, the life force binding it together destroyed with somewhat explosive results. Satisfied, King of Hearts smiles internally. The first cogs have been set in motion: now for the inevitable result. The Sigilyph's plans didn't account for Barfie's grief-fueled rage, though, and definitely not for the white-hot bolts of electricity and resulting dizzying spiral of pain the Zigzagoon sends his way, but in hindsight, they only delayed his attack. Regretting not pressing his assault when he had the advantage, King of _Swords_ shakes the remaining motes of Electric energy out of his feathers. 

With a shout of "Crimson Shimmer Sword, special attack! Platinum Natural Star!" King charges his now-defenseless opponent, glowing blade renewed and sharp as ever; in the face of the Sigilyph's calculated sweeping glides, even the enraged Barfie balks and runs until he's backed against the tree with nowhere else to go. King of Swords closes in with a gleam in all three of his eyes, ruthlessly determined to see his Master Plans to the finish, dealing four arcing slices—one for each of his creations—before reforming the light of the sword into a brilliant pink beam that hits Barfie squarely in the face and blasts him straight into the tree. Admiring how his opponent struggles to pick himself up from the force of the blow, King of Heartswords sheathes his blade in a coat of Dream Mist and shapes his (admittedly nonexistent) teeth into a wicked smirk. Turnabout is fair play, as they say.

Eifie (O)

*Tweed Cap Wearer Barfie* (m) <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry
Health: 47%
Energy: 51%
Currently: Blinking the spots out of his eyes. Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a tiny cap.
Used: Substitute (15) ~ Natural Gift ~ Thunderbolt

Music Dragon (O)

*King Magical Girl of Swords* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 42%
Energy: 42%
Currently: Flitting around the clearing placidly. Poisoned (toxic: 4% this round, 5% next.) Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power. Still wielding the Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun ~ Platinum Natural Star because of shenanigans.
Used: Psychic x3

Field Notes
-Small piles of charred and uncharred fur have collected around the clearing.

Action Notes
-Swords are totally an actual suit! It works on multiple levels, too, since they apparently symbolize air or wind in tarot. The more you know?
-So, uh, (thanks MD for pointing out that) King of Hearts doesn't actually know Sunny Day, so he used no-charge Solar Beams actions two and three. This results in him losing a remarkable 1% energy. Sorry for not double-checking that beforehand!!
-Double edit time! Thanks, Eifie, for pointing out that because of the above point, King actually should have used Psychic, which I did not catch because I am bad at this. King of Hearts loses 4% further energy.
-Triple edit: ...Right! Okay, reffing redone with the bare minimum of changes. Barfie gains 1% health, King gains 12% energy for a net change of +7% from the original 35.
-King of Hearts's first Solar Beam second Psychic was a critical hit and destroyed Barfie's substitute.

Eifie commands next.


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## Superbird (Jun 27, 2015)

Swords also correspond to Spades rather than Hearts (Hearts correspond to Cups, Diamonds to Wands, and Clubs to Coins/Pentacles), but. Even so, I'm thrilled to see any sort of reference to tarot in any context!

/me goes back to watching quietly


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## Eifie (Jun 27, 2015)

nooo poor Barfie ;; (commands later when I'm not in bed)


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## Keldeo (Jun 27, 2015)

Thank you to Music Dragon for bringing to my attention that his Pokemon does not in fact learn Sunny Day! As a result, Magical King of Heartswords loses 1% energy, and the actual reffing has been edited accordingly. Eifie is now free to command with the new situation in mind.

edit @below: Right, fixed. King loses 4% more energy.

edit @next page: Edits detailed in the action notes. Apologies for screwing this one up so badly.


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## Eifie (Jun 27, 2015)

Oops, I totally meant to check that Sigilyph learns Sunny Day and then couldn't be bothered. Not that it will make much difference (alas), but according to Music Dragon's commands, shouldn't the King have used Psychic instead?


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## Eifie (Jun 27, 2015)

oh wait crap this is BAD. so bad. but yeah, the King should have used Psychic on the second and third action as well, right? (that's what I meant initially, haha, because for some reason I thought Sunny Day was used without conditionals on the first action)


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## Eifie (Jun 27, 2015)

You're doing great, Barfie. :3 I think now is a good time to use up the free turn a *Swagger* will grant us! If your opponent somehow gets up a Safeguard or Substitute before you move, zap him with a *Thunderbolt* instead, and if he's protecting just sit there cutely. And your opponent shouldn't be able to move before you, but in case he does, *Natural Gift* if there are clones. (I declare that the sit there cutely should not count as a conditional! It is cute, and also I could technically word my commands so that Barfie has nothing to do if there is a Protect anyway, but then his doing nothing might not be so cute.)

Next, if you didn't successfully hit with *Swagger* before, do so now. Otherwise, or if he has a Safeguard or Substitute or is unhittable in some other way, I would like to see an adorable *Ba-rain Dance*! This is not to be confused with any special dances they may have in Bahrain. Your dance is supposed to actually _make it rain_, you see. And idk if you can't do what you're supposed to do, just *Natural Gift*. Why not?

Finally, if it's raining, roar your rage to the skies with a *Thunder*! If he is unhittable, though, idk. Just sit there cutely some more. And if it's not raining but you've successfully hit with Swagger, use *Rain Dance* now, and otherwise if he doesn't have a Safeguard or Substitute up try a *Swagger*. If he does, though, just see if you can hit with Thunder anyway, I guess.

Oh yeah, and I like your hat.

*Swagger / Thunderbolt / Natural Gift ~ Swagger / Rain Dance / Natural Gift ~ Thunder / Rain Dance / Swagger*


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## Music Dragon (Jul 4, 2015)

Hoohoohoo! I'm going to be brief because I've got a lot going on in the Real World (as opposed to the Dream World). Let's start off with *Psycho Shift* to get rid of those awful, awful toxins. You really need to get yourself a cup-bearer, Your Majesty. As soon as you've successfully done that - which should happen on your second action - let's do something stupid and use *Trick*, just because I'm curious about what will happen. Finally, should you happen to have any actions left, just go back to *Psychic*.

*Psycho Shift ~ Psycho Shift / Trick ~ Psycho Shift / Trick / Psychic*


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## Keldeo (Jul 6, 2015)

Eifie (O)

*Barfie* (m) <Gluttony> @ Lansat Berry
Health: 47%
Energy: 51%
Currently: Blinking the spots out of his eyes. Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a tiny cap.
Commands: Swagger / Thunderbolt / Natural Gift (/ sit cutely) ~ Swagger / Rain Dance / Natural Gift ~ Thunder / Rain Dance / Swagger (/ sit cutely)

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 42%
Energy: 42%
Currently: Flitting around the clearing placidly. Poisoned (toxic: 4% this round, 5% next.) Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power. Wielding the Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun ~ Platinum Natural Star.
Commands: Psycho Shift ~ Psycho Shift / Trick ~ Psycho Shift / Trick / Psychic

Field Notes
-Small piles of charred and uncharred fur have collected around the clearing.

*Round 5*​
As soon as he recovers from King of Hearts's attack, Barfie barks sharply to catch his opponent's attention. Once the Sigilyph has turned his way, he sing-songs, "Hahaa! I'm cuter than you are! And your sword is totally uncute, too. If you're a king, you have to be cute, but you're not cute, so you can't be a king!"  King of Hearts flaps a little closer, ready to offer the thirty-seven rebuttals he's specifically prepared in case of this situation, but Barfie continues before he can respond. "That's a Law of Logic, and it's named after an old person because it's named after an old person. Relatedly? You aren't cute because you aren't cute. See, I actually passed tautology class, but apparently you didn't, because you're not cute. Also, I wear hats. Are you cute or not?" Barfie grins and keeps going, to King's confusion and, soon, chagrin. "Definitely not, because you aren't. (If you were wondering, your sword isn't cute or fabulous either. It's un-fabulo-cute!) Oh, oh, and, um…" 

King of Hearts hopes this trailing off means that the Zigzagoon is finally running out of steam, but Barfie soon opens his mouth again. "I'll be frank with you here. (It's funny because my name isn't Frank.) What you did to my friend—the magician, you remember him?—was mean. And I used to be a magician, you know, because I used to be a magician. They called me a conjuror, but you're not cute!" The Zigzagoon goes on with his tirade, but King stops listening, instead letting his rage build up and boil over like… like a pot of pasta water _without pasta!_ The thought makes him want to gesture dramatically towards everything in anger and righteously shout to the heavens something along the lines of _See, this poser's got me so riled up I can't even come up with good similes!_ In frustration, the Sigilyph gives up trying to sharpen the Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun in preparation for revenge and drops it, confident that Barfie won't be able to get any more insult fodder out of that train of thought. (He is wrong.) After a minute more of jabbering on about all sorts of not even tangentially related topics, connected by the bare and long-dead-horseish thread of King's uncuteness, Barfie finishes with a gleam in his eye: "…and what all that adds up to mean is, drumroll please, I'm cuter than you are! …Obviously, since that's what I said in the beginning."

This dreadful statement is the last straw on the metaphorical camel's back, resulting in said camel becoming a camel deity to the other camels, who rebel agains the people, who're just wondering where and why they wanted to ship so many straws. (Perhaps that wasn't the best way of extending the metaphor, given the current situation, but it works, kind of.) King of Hearts flaps down and bodily grabs the Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Shimmer Sun, which burns and sizzles a large patch on his wing. With a shout, the incensed Sigilyph swoops down with no hint of the finesse or fluidity with which he handled the sword before, taking obviously-too-long strokes and wide swipes that Barfie is easily able to dodge. After a while more of futile effort, the hard light's prickly burning sensation becomes too much, and King of Hearts flings his sword away with a hiss to tend to his wound. 

Meanwhile, Barfie laughs and runs circles around the injured Sigilyph, laying the groundwork for his next maneuver: a faint trail of bluish energy seeping into the ground around him, becoming more opaque as time passes. One moment, the sky is as clear as ever, the island neither too hot nor too cold. The next, the circle of blue lights up, shooting like a shimmering neon wall into the suddenly gray clouds gathering overhead before fading away. It starts to rain, a light patter at first but quickly building into a stormy downpour heavier than anyone present has experienced before. The water comes down in sheets, each individual drop stinging when it hits bare skin (or, in the cases of Barfie and King, fur and feathers) and turning the dirt and dust around the clearing into pools of aqueous muck. Within moments, everyone is drenched, and the storm shows no signs of stopping. 

Barfie grins and shakes out some excess water, delighted his move worked, while King of Hearts retreats into the not-very-sheltering boughs of the great tree and extends a few psychic feelers. It's about time he got rid of this awful nauseating sensation, and he bets there's somewhere in the world where making it rain and poisoning kings are both illegal. Outlaws cannot be tolerated! Across the field, Barfie is flung into the air with a yelp as King's mental state hits him like a bodily blow, and as the purplish patch on the Sigilyph's face fades and shrinks, a similar blotch blossoms across Barfie's nose. King of Hearts sighs, contented that he's finally rid of _that_, before noticing his target glaring at him, hackles raised and teeth bared. Without warning, a narrow yellow beam shoots upward from Barfie's back, filled with the Zigzagoon's energy; once the electricity has reached the clouds, he settles back down with a low bark as a few stray bits of static crackle about his fur. King hears a sharp, impossibly loud crackle from above—and then the bolt hits him in a flash of white, driving his face into the muddy ground like a too-large hammer. He can't close his eyes fast enough and ends up having to blink a murky film out of them, in too much pain to think of doing much else, let alone lifting off again…

The dazed Sigilyph just lies there for a few minutes, and upon regaining control of his muscles, he flaps back upward wearily, his third eye drooping. Well, if he isn't going to win this with force of will or brute force, he might as well embarrass the Zigzagoon. King of Hearts adopts his best annoying-salesperson face and flies over, imbuing his words with a faint psychic suggestion. "Hi there! Would you like this sphere of air? It's a great deal, one for just the price of… Oh, you don't look like you have enough money to buy it outright, but I'd gladly give it to you for that berry!" Of course, Barfie accepts, and King hands over his "sphere of air" before swooping in and snatching the berry. He munches thoughtfully on the snack as Barfie's expression morphs from triumphant to agitated and then furious just as King finishes the last bite, tossing the stem and leaves into a mud puddle by the tree with a smirk. The two battlers face off and glare pointedly at each other as the referee lowers her flags to end the round. While Barfie is healthier, the toxins King had transferred to him with look like they're already taking their toll, and the Zigzagoon is in a notably worse mood after the trick his opponent played on him…

Eifie (O)

*Berryless Barfie* (m) <Gluttony>
Health: 45%
Energy: 35%
Currently: More than ready to avenge his lost berry. Poisoned (toxic: 5%* this round, 6% next.) Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a tiny cap.
Used: Swagger ~ Rain Dance ~ Thunder

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 17%
Energy: 36%
Currently: Fluttering around, guard up. Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power.
Used: (confused) ~ Psycho Shift ~ Trick

Field Notes
-It is raining (7 more actions.) Several patches of mucky and swamplike ground have formed as a result.
-The Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun is lying on the ground near the tree, glowing as brightly as ever. A Pokemon who picks it up gains +20 Appeal, +3 Spirit, and +10% to their Magic and Luck growths and can use the special technique Natural Platinum Star, but loses 3 MP after every action in addition to their movement reduction and/or retreat cost, if any.
-Small piles of charred and uncharred fur have collected around the clearing. They're all wet now, though.

Action Notes
*: Ingame, Psycho Shift resets the poison counter, but I thought it would make more flavor sense for it to stay at the same severity. Because of the way I handle spreading toxic poison damage through the actions, this meant that King took 3% poison damage this round and Barfie took 2%. I don't think the "a Pokemon can't be poisoned with its own poison" rule really applies here, but if it does, let me know.
-I actually checked that everyone could learn all the moves they used this time… Tell me if you spot any errors in this round :s
-As with Barfie's back in round 3, King's Attack boost faded after his confusion did.
-King's and Barfie's items, both illusory and not, have been swapped, and I don't think there's anything to be lost by revealing the new items here, since both of you know what your Pokemon were originally holding, so King is now holding a Lucky Egg and Barfie an Iron Ball. The illusory Lansat Berry has been eaten by King, but since Lucky Eggs aren't consumable, he didn't actually.
-Also, once the battle ends, I'll publicly reveal who's behind the illusions, unless one of you has an objection?

MD commands next.


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## Eifie (Jul 6, 2015)

Haha! I knew it was an Iron Ball! Alas, your Majesty, it is too late!


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## Music Dragon (Jul 7, 2015)

Ugh! A Lucky Egg!? How disappointing! These things are a dime a dozen! And apparently they're not even edible!? You refs will take any excuse to prevent me from eating, won't you...

Well, Your Majesty, they leave us no choice - bring out the Royal Artillery! I want every Flash Cannon, Zap Cannon, Hydro Cannon and Spike Cannon we have ready to fire and I want them ready ten minutes ago!

What? What do you mean "we only have Flash Cannons"? Really? ... Then perhaps it's over. Hmm! You're tougher than you look, Barfie! But hope springs eternal.

Lead with *Hypnosis*, My King! We're allowed to inflict Sleep once, so we might as well try to do it. You should be faster than Barfie too, but if he can't be Hypnotized for whatever reason, fall back on *Future Sight*. And if he attempts some sort of combo that would strike you down in one hit, you need to *Protect*.

On your second action: if Barfie's asleep, use *Dream Eater* and target Energy; if he's awake but can be Hypnotized, try to *Hypnotize* him again; and if he's awake and can't be Hypnotized, use *Psychic* and cry regally.

On your last action: if Barfie's asleep, use *Dream Eater* and again target Energy; if he's awake but can be Hypnotized, try to *Hypnotize* him one last time; otherwise, use *Protect* and pray to all the gods.

For the King!

*Hypnosis / Future Sight / Protect ~ Dream Eater (energy) / Hypnosis / Psychic ~ Dream Eater (energy) / Hypnosis / Protect*


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## Eifie (Jul 7, 2015)

All right, Barfie, you can only be put to sleep once, and it's only going to last two actions at most, so instead of trying anything tricky, let's do this. Let him hypnotize you. Stare into the wondrous third eye of a king... you'll never get another chance like this, you know? Well, okay, no. Try your very best to avoid that Hypnosis. It's only 60% accuracy, after all. Don't you dare let him hypnotize you! You're too cute for that!

If you manage to resist the allure of a King, thank him very much for an enjoyable battle by *Fling*ing his kind gift at him. Amusingly, it's the only item powerful enough to knock him out, since Fling is a Dark-type attack! Haha! If you're asleep, just *do nothing*. We can't spare that much energy now.

If you wake up on the second action, go forth and *Fling*. If you're asleep, *do nothing*. On the third action you'll be awake for sure, and I'm not quite sure if he's going to Protect. If he does, make yourself a small *Substitute* as a buffer for next round. Otherwise, you know what to do. (And if you're still asleep, somehow, continue to do nothing.)

*Fling / do nothing ~ Fling / do nothing ~ Substitute (10%) / Fling / do nothing*


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## Keldeo (Jul 10, 2015)

Eifie (O)

*Barfie* (m) <Gluttony>
Health: 45%
Energy: 35%
Currently: More than ready to avenge his lost berry. Poisoned (toxic: 5% this round, 6% next.) Has an Electric typed Hidden Power. Wearing a tiny cap.
Commands: Fling / do nothing ~ Fling / do nothing ~ Substitute (10%) / Fling / do nothing

Music Dragon (O)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Magic Guard>
Health: 17%
Energy: 36%
Currently: Fluttering around, guard up. Has a Dragon typed Hidden Power.
Commands: Hypnosis / Future Sight / Protect ~ Dream Eater (energy) / Hypnosis / Psychic ~ Dream Eater (energy) / Hypnosis / Protect

Field Notes
-It is raining (7 more actions.) Several patches of mucky and swamplike ground have formed as a result.
-The Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun is lying on the ground near the tree, glowing as brightly as ever. A Pokemon who picks it up gains +20 Appeal, +3 Spirit, and +10% to their Magic and Luck growths and can use the special technique Natural Platinum Star, but loses 3 MP after every action in addition to their movement reduction and/or retreat cost, if any.
-Small piles of charred and uncharred fur have collected around the clearing. They're all wet now, though.

*Round 6*​


Spoiler: universe 1



King of Hearts emits a mesmerizing red beam, but Barfie avoids it by making a pun on "no dice" and "the roll for Hypnosis hitting was 63" and takes advantage of the ensuing confusion to bash him over the head with a black ball.





Spoiler: universe 2



King of Hearts is tiring, and he knows it. He gazes soulfully up at the stormy gray stormclouds above and sighs; the picture they paint is bleak, dull, a monotony of shadows and shades, the sky barely visible through the thick blanket of void. The drumming rain beats out a bizarre pattern of ripples in the mud below him, like a marching band without a conductor—disorganized, unruly, chaotic. Each unsynchronized drop muddles the otherwise beautiful patterns the others would create, interference upon interference piled high until nothing but a vague, indecisive mess remains. Rainwater mixes with the dirt and grime on his face, rivulets streaming down and dripping slowly into the pool. 

Cut off from the rest of the world by the pouring sheets of rain around him, King of Hearts sheds a single tear.

But then, he gasps, startled out of his reverie by a chance event. Is it? Could it be?! A single ray of sunlight, barely even a sliver, has bravely broken through the stifling barrier of clouds to grace his presence with the long-awaited kiss of warmth! King of Hearts resolves himself and raises one wing to the skies, newly inspired. With a low, deep cry, he proclaims his goals of victory to the world at large. He can and will be triumphant in this battle, no matter what it takes. He can and will bring down this upstart, for the glory of the King, and by extension the Royal Court, and by extension the entire Kingdom of Hearts! Yes, he—wait, _ow,_ what the—

(Yipping and wagging his tail with glee, Barfie places one paw on the newly revealed Iron Ball, still crackling with Dark energy, that lies at rest on King's fainted body.)



Eifie (O)

*Barfie* (m) <Quick Feet>
Health: 45%
Energy: 27%
Currently: Victorious!
Used: Fling (Iron Ball)

Music Dragon (x)

*King of Hearts* (m) <Tinted Lens> @ Lucky Egg
Health: 0%
Energy: 35%
Currently: Still regal, even in unconsciousness.
Used: Hypnosis (missed)

Field Notes
-It is raining (6 more actions.) Several patches of mucky and swamplike ground have formed as a result.
-An Iron Ball is resting upon King's fainted body.
-The Crimson Shimmer Sword of Majestic Fairy Sun is lying on the ground near the tree, glowing as brightly as ever. A Pokemon who picks it up gains +20 Appeal, +3 Spirit, and +10% to their Magic and Luck growths and can use the special technique Natural Platinum Star, but loses 3 MP after every action in addition to their movement reduction and/or retreat cost, if any.
-Small piles of charred and uncharred fur have collected around the clearing. They're all wet now, though.

Action Notes
-Fling was a critical hit, though it didn't matter.

And the scandalous revelations: Barfie was Barfie, and King of Hearts was King of Hearts. Shocking, right? In any case, I really liked this arena's gimmick, and it was fun seeing the battle progress! Thank you both for an entertaining match, and good game, everyone. Eifie gets $8, Omskivar and I get $2, and Music Dragon gets $4. Barfie receives 3 exp and 2 happiness, while King of Hearts gets 1 of each.


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## Eifie (Jul 10, 2015)

Haha! Truly we were meant to be adversaries! Thank you for a gripping battle of wits, MD and the King! Thank you for truly adorable reffing of my sweet little puppy, Omskivar and Keldeo!

And of course, Baaaaaaarfie. <3 You will be getting many snuggles tonight! (You are getting them as we speak, actually.) I knew your cuteness was enough to dethrone the most regal of kings!


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## Music Dragon (Jul 10, 2015)

The King is dead! Long live the King!

Barfie, you have earned the Crown of Hearts by slaying the former King in single combat. Wear it w - hmm, actually, your head is a bit too small for this thing. We'll, uh, get it refitted or something. Anyway. Go! Take the Iron Orb-and-Cross, and with it, claim your seat on the Throne of Farts! Hearts. Throne of Hearts.

Oh, and I must of course express my gratitude to Keldeo and The Omskivar for your fantastic efforts. You have my thanks!

And Eifie... This is not the end! I'll be back, with something even more powerful than a mere King or Doctor! Just you wait...!


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